Writer's Block: It’s the end of the world as we know it
If you had the option to learn the exact moment and details of your death, would you choose to know?

I hate these questions. I can't possibly predict the psychological effect of knowing my death on me. There's a chance it could inspire me to "live for the moment". There's also a chance it could ruin me mentally. We see both of these states in the terminally ill.

I suppose possibly knowing might be like having a terminal illness, in terms of our psychological approach. We're all so in denial about our mortality half the time, that I think people would react in similar ways.

I suppose this doesn't answer the question, but in a way, it does. Knowing or not knowing could be good or bad, so really, I'm guaranteed to win/lose if I choose/don't choose. Obviously, this is the case with all decision making, but in this instance, it's somewhat unknowable. Although I suppose you could speculate based on current personality features and whatnot, but it's not something I could accurately predict for myself.


I've been reading this whole thread, and it makes me infinitely sad. Apparently, changing the only non-caucasian character in a game to being white and blonde is not racism, and is just be a "preference". Also, people get very, very defensive over being called racist.

One of my favourite quotes was "You're the one making an issue out of race. We're not. So you're actually a racist".

Wroonnggg. So effing wrong.

The worst thing about society is everyone's sudden decision that everyone is equal, and racism, sexism and homophobia are over and the world is all nice and rainbows and sunshine, and DON'T YOU DARE IMPLY I HAVE ANYTHING TO DO WITH RACISM GASP.

The entire of society upholds racism. I uphold racism. You uphold racism. The victims of racism uphold racism. We can't just pretend it doesn't exist, and start running around going "I'm not racist! I'm just more attracted to caucasians!".

I really want to break down this entire thread and gather my academic thoughts on it properly, but it'd just be a waste of my time as it'd only be for me.

"The whole thing comes across as offensive to me - Like a large portion of polite society, I make an effort when I am in public, because I realize that I have to share public space with everyone else. What makes someone so special that they get to treat it like their living room? It's uncomfortable to be around, and it's so arrogant and insufferable." - Woman on Jezebel.

I'm reading an article on women and street harrassment, and that is the comment that has angered me the most.

Get off your high horse and suck it up, princess. I have said this a lot, and I will say it again, and maybe get it printed on a business card to save my effing breath.


People are there to live their lives. However the hell they want. As long as what they're doing isn't infringing on people's rights, then let them BE. STOP TRYING TO IMPOSE YOUR STUPID INSIPID BELIEFS.

And no, somebody wearing Uggs is not infringing on your rights.

(And I HATE Uggs >>.)

Broken Hearts Hurt, But They Make Us Strong
A year ago, I got dumped. I only remember this because it was a month after we started going out officially, and that was around my birthday.

It was the last nice thing Matthew did for me. Genuinely, thank you so much. The thought of being with you makes me vomit in my mouth a little.

You were the first, so it hurt a little more than usual. I just regret wasting all that perfectly good heartbreak on someone so... spineless. Bah.

But now I have a better boyfriend, piece of mind and such amazing friends. <3

Life is Sweet
Stuff is going well.

Dissertation is slaying me. 4000/10000...ish.

Am enjoying my relationship with Stewart. Spend the little time we get together right now being all geeky and cuddlin' and shit :D. But some days I'll be totally up on the whole thing, thinking about futures and that L word. Other days, I'll be kind of doubting, wondering if I'm just getting carried away, focusing on little issues.

But I think that's par for the course. At least I hope it is.

Japanese lessons are lovely :)! The horrors of York University are fading, and I'm learning at a slower pace in a nice environment. It's fantastic.

But yeah, my last term of Uni... and it's nearly over. So strange! Don't know what's coming next. We'll see...

My brain is on strike.

C'mon brain only 1000 words left.

This is the worst essay ever. It's about history, religion, psychology... oh, and a smidge of Philosophy. Y'know, my degree programme. Which is all obviously very good and interesting, but so frickin' difficult.

I've extracted most of the Freudian concepts... now to have at the Marxist content. Then the Judeo-Christian historical stuff... before looking at modern research and disproving everything he said. Fromm My Life.

I am very, very poor. I have -£600. I owe my parents abouuut £1200 in rent (although it might be £800 at this point). My overdraft extends to about -£900. I need mah next loan installment damnit!

I'd go apply for financial aid, except it's totally all my fault, and my bank statement just tells a tale of video games and eating in restaurants.

I have this wakeup call every term I guess. I like having stuff. And when I'm stressed from working too much... I buy more stuff to make myself feel better.

I guess half the battle is recognizing the problem. Now I can try exercise moderation >>.

I'm tired and exhausted and oh so busy.

But nice little silver lining.

The guy I like likes me back. There could be something here. :)


Methinks my doctors will regret not filling in my statement of physician, when I need to have multiple sessions regarding the total breakdown I'm about to have regarding them ruining my JET application.


I've spent £50 ($100) on this goddamn application so far, as well as a lot (LOT LOT) of hours of my life. This is time I could be spending doing my dissertation, or even relaxing so I'm not a total ball of stress from having no free time.


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